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such_heights) wrote2018-12-13 12:14 am
such_heights) wrote2018-12-13 12:14 am
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Adult-diagnosed ADHD
After a long time wondering and obsessing about the question, last week I booked myself into an ADHD assessment with a private psychiatrist. Turns out I have 'mild to moderate' ADHD. I should be starting medication sometime in the next few weeks. I am hopeful, relieved, excited, a bit lost. This simultaneously sits somewhat at odds with the picture I have of myself while also making a lot of things about my life make more sense.
All of this came to a head after another diagnosis, fibromyalgia, earlier this year. There's an interesting study suggesting there's a lot of crossover between the two conditions, and certainly my experiences of cognitive difficulties through fibro felt like an escalation of problems that had always been there, and were now harder to manage. And one possible explanation for the fibro onset is that it's a reaction to emotional trauma from my dad's illness and death.
It's been a rough couple of years.
But! I'm hopeful this diagnosis is going to help in areas of my life where I've felt really stuck. I am trying to read/watch/listen to as much as I can, though I'm finding some aspects to be far more relevant than others. I've been enjoying![[youtube.com profile]](https://youtube.com/favicon.ico)
howtoadhd and going through ADDitude magazine. I'd love recommendations for any and all media, books etc. And if anyone has advice for a newly-diagnosed inattentive-type (probably) 29 year old then I would love that too.
All of this came to a head after another diagnosis, fibromyalgia, earlier this year. There's an interesting study suggesting there's a lot of crossover between the two conditions, and certainly my experiences of cognitive difficulties through fibro felt like an escalation of problems that had always been there, and were now harder to manage. And one possible explanation for the fibro onset is that it's a reaction to emotional trauma from my dad's illness and death.
It's been a rough couple of years.
But! I'm hopeful this diagnosis is going to help in areas of my life where I've felt really stuck. I am trying to read/watch/listen to as much as I can, though I'm finding some aspects to be far more relevant than others. I've been enjoying
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I'm pretty cheerful about it now, but it definitely was a lot to process. (See the years long delay between diagnosis and medication, ahaha.)
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My son is ADHD(PI) and recently I started following a tumblr blog I found really helpful. https://abcsofadhd.tumblr.com/ It seems to be helping other people, and there's even a discord server.
*sends all the good wishes*
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i>You Mean I'm Not Lazy, Stupid or Crazy?: The Classic Self-Help Book For Adults with Attention Deficit Disorder, Kate Kelley (mental health nurse and ADHD specialist) and Peggy Ramundo (long-term ADHD coach)
https://adultingwithadhd.com/
Are you looking for help/support things, or a wider range? One of the things I know my sister finds helpful as well is books/media by or featuring ADHD/probably-ADHD people, as it both makes her feel less bizarre and also (she says) helps her identify places where she didn't realize that her brain works different from everyone else's.
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- ADHD symptoms/tendencies/etc will absolutely be exacerbated by any kind of fatigue or stress; there's a reason the front-line drug treatments for it are stimulants! Higher stress, lower energy, higher cognitive load, any of those things are likely to make all manifestations of attention-deficit rise.
- emotional trauma is not only potentially related to the fibro, but it's also potentially related to the ADHD becoming A Thing That Demands Intervention (rather than a thing you were previously managing via long-term coping skills etc); emotional/psychological trauma stresses a lot of the same mental systems, as far as we can tell (sufficient that long-term PTSD/C-PTSD can be make it hard to determine "is this ADHD? is this the trauma-disorder? is it both?"), so that's also a thing.
- it took my sister years to be able to parse for herself the difference between being on or off her medication; on the other hand I could tell from the outside within about three hours. It just makes it potentially worth it to be using other people you trust as diagnostically helpful, as you start the meds, on the lines of "have you noticed things being different?"
- a thing I have very much noticed in people I know diagnosed as full adults is that initially it may seem amaaazing! more easy to do stuff! and then in six months or so you'll feel like somehow you're terrible again and never get anything done/etc and the work hasn't fixed anything! . . . which is reallly the point that as far as I've seen external povs can be useful? Because what that usually means is that sure! you're not operating at your desired optimal yet? but actually you're probably still much better than you were, and you've just adjusted to a new normal. (I mean depression is similar? So I suspect this is not a totally revolutionary thought? But I've found it sooooo worth keeping in mind.)
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1.) Digital, paper, whatever, try finding SOMETHING to write down your tasks for the day, if there are any. Simply the act of writing it down will help you remember it better.
2.) Try reading up on Hyperfocus. It's a symptom of ADHD that may make you wonder if you actually have inattentive ADHD, but really it's just another symptom.
3.) Invest in sensitive tooth medicine. "What in the world does ADHD have to do with teeth"----the medication may end up affecting your teeth! It can cause dry mouth, which is bad because saliva helps clean your teeth. It can also cause you to grind your teeth both morning and night, which, y'know , is also not great for your teeth.
4. If you're finding yourself unable to enjoy hobbies like reading or gaming or anything that requires attention---break it up into small sections. Read until the next chapter, play until the next save screen, things like that.
5. There's a lot of apps out there that help you with attention. I like this app called "Forest" that keeps me off of my phone when I'm busy. It grows trees. It's cute.
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OMG. A friend was diagnosed with ADHD a few years ago and her teeth grinding (which had always been an issue) has gone into massive over-drive to the point where she's had surgery this year and has regular botox injections. I had no idea her meds could be exacerbating it!
Also, yes, my friend has the hyperfocus thing. Never on anything useful. She needs to write an assignment for her MBA? But there's a mark on the bathtub and six hours of tub scrubbing later she has sore arms and no assignment.
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Hahaha, nothing like procrastination through cleaning. Everytime. Always. It's "just as productive" as whatever task you want to do, and it's not as guilt-inducing as video games or other entertainment, so it's like it makes it extra appealing for whatever causes hyperfocus. I've spent SO MANY HOURS cleaning and decluttering when I should've been doing something else.
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I also agree about writing down tasks and breaking things into sections. Sometimes I'll break my to-do list into a lot of tiny subtasks to check off. (I've heard of other people who find this as much difficulty as help, though, because they can get very caught up in the distraction of polishing their to-do lists. So, again, YMMV.)
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https://goodnightmoonvale.tumblr.com/post/178244708227/things-i-didnt-know-were-caused-by-adhd
https://amusewithaview.tumblr.com/post/158341250700/quinfirefrorefiddle-eeddis-adhighdefinition
https://beatrice-otter.tumblr.com/post/158870448907/forget-the-myths-what-adhd-is-actually-like
https://violent-darts.tumblr.com/post/162147679480/47-hacks-people-with-addadhd-use-to-stay-on-track
https://amusewithaview.tumblr.com/post/166505424724/aenramsden-deadcatwithaflamethrower
https://beatrice-otter.tumblr.com/post/168489082702/what-are-the-symptoms-of-adhd-besides
http://star-anise.tumblr.com/post/172507318029/3-defining-features-of-adhd-that-everyone
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I am also super fascinated by the tangled, complex crossover between things like depression/ADHD/autism and things like fibromyalgia and other chronic conditions! If you ever want to ramble about it at someone, I'm here. :) (I have this whole long theory about how coping with undiagnosed autism my entire life basically gave me depression, and then fibromyalgia, as my nervous system slowly broke down, and I think that the load of coping with undiagnosed ADHD would be v. v. similar. And I know that my fibro's onset/ups & downs are definitely tied to trauma and stress, so I hear you there!!!)
I can't speak from personal experience, as it's my partner who has ADHD, but we found that just searching "ADHD" on Ask Metafilter was super helpful. Lots of smart, thorough people there sharing personal anecdotes and experiences. (Metafilter is a community whose norms & conversation kinda reminds me of '90s internet, much like Dreamwidth.)
Keep us updated on how treatment goes! <3
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Medication had really helped her (Although the social anxiety is still present).
Medication also relieved a lot of her food obsession and basically resolved her orthorexia.